


Punch a Mirror (Don't Rip Out My Heart)

by warriorwoman



Category: UnREAL (TV)
Genre: F/F, Mild Smut, Women In Power, angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-25
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-04-08 01:43:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,369
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14094285
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/warriorwoman/pseuds/warriorwoman
Summary: "I'm fine.""You keep saying that as if somehow it means something. You're not okay, Rachel."





	1. Bloody Knuckles

**Author's Note:**

> idk i wrote this on a whim. please leave kudos and comments if ya like it.

Rachel lightly dabbed the concealer across her cheekbone, watching the dark bruise hide beneath the light layer of makeup. She took a shaky breath and gazed into the mirror, pulling her bottom lip between her teeth, trying to stop her it from wobbling in emotion. The longer she gazed, the more her emotions began to build.

She didn't even feel the pain when she punched through the mirror, shards of glass flying in every direction. Rachel looked down at her hand and watched the gashes on her knuckles bleed onto her shoes. She sighed and just watched the blood flow.

Just as she was about to begin cleaning up, the door opened and Quinn's voice barreled through the room. "We need to get every girl out of here and in fancy gowns. I want to shove romance down the audience's throats until they choke." Quinn turned to Rachel and her voice died down. "Rachel?"

"What, Quinn?" The brunette asked, her tone flat and without feeling. She ran her blood free hand through her hair, her eyes glazed over.

"What's wrong?" Quinn took a step closer to Rachel, reaching a hesitant hand out to the woman's bloody one. "Why the hell?"

"No. I-I just had an accident." Rachel snapped herself out of the spiraling black hole her mind was set towards.

"Unless putting your hand through inch thick glass constitutes an accident, something is wrong." Quinn grabbed Rachel's hand and walked her over to the sink, running the water over her injured hand. "Jesus, Rachel. What the hell were you thinking? This could've done serious damage."

"I'm fine." Rachel sighed, trying to pull her hand away but failing as Quinn held even tighter.

The older woman shook her head with a scowl and grabbed a paper towel to dry Rachel's hand off gently. "People who are fine don't punch mirrors."

"Yeah well, whatever."

Quinn rolled her eyes and reached under the sink for the tiny first aid kit. She grabbed the gauze and wrapped it around Rachel's hand, watching the woman's face for any sign of discomfort. She saw none and that concerned her more than the possibility of seeing pain. If Rachel was numb to physical pain, she didn't want to think about how numb the woman could be to her mental and emotional pain. She knew how much the girl would bottle up. It always ended in some sort of disaster. Quinn wished she had seen the signs sooner so she could've prevented Rachel from putting her hand through the goddamned glass.

"Have you ever thought about what you'd be doing if you never worked for  _Everlasting_?"

"Have you?" Quinn fired back, finishing wrapping the gauze and moved her hands to cup Rachel's cheeks. "Because you're the one who's struggling with working here. I see it every time you make a contestant do something,  _well,_  unorthodox. I love that shit, it turns me on." Quinn chuckled before continuing, "but I see the way it turns you into a manipulative off the charts bitch."

"Yeah well, I'm fine."

"You keep saying that as if somehow it means something. You're not okay, Rachel." Quinn stated bluntly, tugging the younger woman over to the small bed and forcing her to sit. "You need to figure this out," Quinn told her before moving to leave Rachel on her own to get her shit together.

Rachel watched her go, letting out a shaky breath.

~~~

"Uh, let's get a close up on our wifey," Rachel muttered into the mic, picking at the two-day-old scabs on her knuckles.

Quinn was giving her a side eye as she watched the younger woman pick away. "Alright, that's a cut!" She paused before looking around the room and yelling, "Everyone out.  _Now_!"

Rachel didn't look up. She didn't even bother to acknowledge Quinn's order. The older woman waited until everyone exited the room before moving to sit next to Rachel. "Look, I don't know what's gotten into you, but you need to snap the fuck out of it and start acting like the monster, the  _Rachel_ , I know," Quinn said, pissed off and shaking her head.

"I'm not sure I want to be that monster anymore, Quinn. I've done some reflecting-"

" _Bullshit_. You knew what you were in for from the first day."

Rachel pulled her bottom lip between her teeth and shrugged. "Not all of it."

Quinn motioned wildly with her arms. "Like what? What could you have possibly not have expected, Rachel?! I was straight with you about what working here would-"

"Fuck being straight with me," Rachel muttered before shifting onto Quinn's lap, wrapping her uninjured hand around back the woman's neck, pulling her mouth into hers. She felt Quinn stutter in surprise before feeling the woman's hand grab her jaw and her shoulder to push her away.

"What the hell, Rachel?" The older woman shouted, her eyes watching Rachel's pupils dilate and her bottom lip tremble.

"I need this. Please."

Quinn took a second before she chose what path she would take.

The older woman nodded slowly before her hands moved to Rachel's pants, hastily unbuttoning them. She pulled the zipper down with a forceful tug as she reconnected their lips. She moved her mouth against Rachel's in slow, dirty passion, slipping her tongue in when she heard a soft moan. Quinn pulled away before attaching her lips to the younger woman's neck, kissing down to her collarbone. Rachel's eyes rolled back as Quinn moved her thigh between Rachel's, putting pressure on her sensitive center. "I want to hear you." The older woman demanded before she bit Rachel's neck, hard enough to emit a groan out of the woman and leave a mark, but soft enough not to draw blood.

"Please, Quinn." She groaned as she felt the woman's hands slip under her pants and rub over her underwear. Quinn grabbed Rachel's wrists, being cautious not to hurt her as she moved to pin her down on the couch, smirking at the sounds that spilled out of the younger woman. She began kissing down Rachel's neck before she pulled the woman's shirt off, taking in the simple black bra that covered her breasts.

"Are you sure about this, Goldberg?"

The woman just nodded furiously, wanting Quinn to make her  _come_  already.

Quinn shrugged simply before unclasping Rachel's bra and attaching her mouth to her breasts, pulling a guttural moan from the younger woman as she nipped at the soft skin. Quinn's hands found Rachel's belt and she made quick work of her pants by yanking them off, throwing them  _somewhere_ across the room.

" _Please_." Rachel moaned out for what seemed like the thousandth time, but it was all Quinn needed to hear, dragging her mouth down to Rachel's center after she tugged the woman's panties off.

~~~

"This never happened," Quinn muttered as she pulled her blouse over her head.

Rachel ran her fingers across her lips, ignoring her boss.

"Did you hear me? Rachel?" Quinn finished putting her clothes on and turned the younger woman, raising an eyebrow at Rachel's silence.

"Yeah."

"Good. You better get going. You have to be up early to get the girls ready for their group date."

"Yeah."

Quinn rolled her eyes and straightened her blazer before moving over to Rachel. "You good now?"

"I'm fine." Rachel flinched at the words, and rephrased, "I'm good."

"I can't deal with you anymore tonight." The older woman snatched up her bag and left, slamming the door behind her.

Rachel sat, naked except for her jeans which she pulled on after their  _activity_. "I'm fine." She murmured to herself before throwing on her shirt and grabbing her bra. "I'm  _fine_."


	2. My Girl

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hahaha nine months later but hey, i'm here and have another chapter for ya. :)

Rachel pulled her hair into a pony, sighing as she watched the contestants yell and scream at each other.  _This_  was her job. She wanted to leave but knew this was  _all_ she was good at. Bringing out the worst in people, making them feel such feelings of anger and dissatisfaction with their lives or others.

"Rachel _. Rachel_!" The brunette rolled her eyes at the shouting of Quinn's voice over the radio in her ear.

"Go for Rachel."

" _Get over here now! We have a situation_."

Rachel sighed and complied, walking to the video editing room. She glanced at Quinn before grabbing a walkie-talkie and reassuring the dumbass contestant. When she finished, she gently put the device down and walked out, ignoring Quinn's glare.

Rachel wasn't sure what she was feeling anymore. She didn't know if she even felt  _anything_ anymore. If she had to give what she was feeling a name, it'd be something between depression and apathy. Quinn once told her, "All that crap that happened to you, made you exactly who you are, and you're perfect." Rachel wished she could believe her, but she learned the people she loved the most, always lied.  _Rachel learned that lesson first from her mother, then from Jeremy, and lastly, her father._

Rachel was taken from her thoughts as someone yelled into her headset. She pulled her earpiece out and threw it. The people around gave her a questioning look but didn't think much of it. They'd learned everyone at that damn show was just a little insane _. Rachel and Quinn more than others._

She made her way over to her trailer, closing its door harshly. She fell into her bed and took deep breathes, trying to calm her mind down from all the thoughts she couldn't shut off. Rachel felt exhausted. She didn't give a damn if she was supposed to be working for another two hours. Instead, she rolled over in bed and closed her eyes, willing for sleep,  _for peace_.

Her will for sleep wasn't granted as there was a persistent knock on her door. "Open the fucking door, Rachel."

A few minutes passed before she heard a loud snap and the garage door came barreling up. Rachel scrambled up in her bed as she took in her boss's furious expression.

"No.  _No_. You do not get to be upset at  _me_ for your incompetence and lack of respect towards this show." Quinn pulled the door back down so their 'conversation' was kept between only them. " _I made you_. Don't you  _dare_  forget that."

Rachel shook her head before falling back into the bed. "I never could. You always remind me."

"We are not having this conversation  _again_." Quinn pulled out her phone and sent a few messages while waiting for a rant, or at least a quip, from Rachel. Not hearing a sound, she turned back to her employee. "What is your  _problem_? You're acting like a little brat and I won't have it around the crew." She snarled, shoving her phone in her pocket before getting up in a haste.

"Yeah, got it."

" _Yeah, got it_." Quinn mimicked with a sarcastic tone as she grabbed Rachel by the collar of her blazer and hauled her to her feet. She stared into the girl's eyes before pressing her hand against her throat and pressed herself closer.

Rachel stared back with an indifferent look, her arms hanging by her side.

"Snap  _out_ of it, Rachel. This isn't okay. Whatever the hell  _this_ is." Quinn muttered, her nails lightly squeezing the brunette's neck. "Look at me," She said sternly as Rachel's eyes glanced away.

"Mhmm."

"Okay, listen to me. Okay? Look at me." She pleaded in a more soothing tone. "You're my girl. You get that?" Quinn repeated, loosening her grip on the girl as Rachel brought a shaky hand up to Quinn's.

"Okay," She replied softly, her voice cracking and her eyes burning with unshed tears.

Quinn saw them and dropped her hand in disgust, causing Rachel to drop hers as well. "Seriously? What does it take to -"

Rachel grabbed her boss's hand and tugged it back on her throat. "This. Please, just make me forget. I promise this will fix it."

Quinn studies her with an empty look before pulling her hand away. "No, Rachel. It won't. When you're ready for real help, a real fix to  _whatever_ is wrong with you, you let me know." The woman said as she walked out of the trailer.

_Quinn had quite the habit of walking away when one of them confessed an emotional secret._

The brunette laid in her bed and tried calming her breathing. She tried the inhalation and exhalation her mom taught her in therapy, but thinking of her mother made her more anxious. Rachel shrugged off her tops until she was left in her bra and began to dig her nails into her forearms, grounding herself in the moment. The thoughts of all her mistakes and traumas were colliding with each other and spilling into mess after mess. She gripped her arms tight enough to cause her nails to break the skin. After focusing on the pain, she was able to think again. She released her arms and her glazed eyes looked down. She was bleeding, not bad, but enough to leave a mark if she didn't cover up.

She fell back into the bed and sighed. She was  _exhausted_ of her infatuation with her boss.

If Rachel knew anything, it was that Quinn was a goddess in another universe. She was cunning and beautiful and intelligent and the  _Aphrodite_  of this world. She had fucked a lot of men and a few women but no one could ever compare to Quinn. Rachel missed the time with her boss before her  _little tantrum_ she had on camera, that caused her temporary removal. She missed Quinn's soft smile of approval when she manipulated someone  _just right,_ or the weekend when they booked the wrong hotel rooms and had to share. She remembered how nervous and embarrassed she was at sharing the same room with her mentor. She remembered as she stood awkwardly with her bag and suitcase at the threshold of the door and how Quinn gave her a once-over before telling her with a wink, " _If you think this is bad, wait until we share the bed tonight_."

Rachel didn't know much, but she knew Quinn was a ten trillion word trilogy written in a dead language.

_And she had no clue how to translate a single word._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hehe sorry for the time it took me to update. sooo i am cruel and this is the last chapter! i know, i know, but if ya wanted a happy ending, you shouldn’t have shipped these two lmao.   
> ps- i didn't proofread ONE BIT so yikes sorry if there are like, words missing and shit. luv ya.
> 
> Tumblr: gonaclexa

**Author's Note:**

> i know this ship doesn't have a ton of followers so if y'all could leave kudos and comments so i know people like it, that'd be amazing. thank you xoxo
> 
> Tumblr: gonaclexa


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